However, as you all know I have some issues with success and failure. I initiate self sabotage when either one occurs. Yesterday evening, I cheated. This morning I called up my coach on this journey with a regretful shame. She however, made me realize I really need to take a look at this on deeper levels. She made me feel so much better that this is not weakness, but rather a learning opportunity. I really do need to learn about this at a root level and move on with my life. I do think a lot of it stems from my mother (you guys know a lot of this background). There are other factors too, which I need to work through with some help.
I just feel hopeful and happy to be on this journey. I am going to not only become a slimmer me, but also a better me.
Hope you all are well and as always enjoying transformations on many levels! :)
I'm floored by your physical progress, but also your emotional progress. You really had a number done on you as far as your mom is concerned. I'm glad you're able to recognize it and rather than feel guilt, embrace the experience as one to learn from and let go of!
ReplyDeleteLOVE YOU!!! You're doing awesome!!
Wishing you all the success on this journey to getting healthy, physically and mentally. You certainly deserve it.
ReplyDelete"And the day came, when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom" -- Anais Nin
ReplyDeleteThis seems to sum it up for me: you are blossoming!
yes, your mother did a number on you, but you are so much more than that, and don't have to let her feelings or anything she has said about you, define you. At some point in our lives, we begin to see our parents as vulnerable people, who make mistakes and don't always know everything (and sometimes we can love them in spite of, or because of that -- and sometimes not). That is the process of 'becoming'. Becoming an adult, who loves herself just as she is, who likes her opinions and viewpoints, and loves the people in her life. No one else has to approve, just you. Parents don't have to give their blessing for you to be happy, just you.
You are a beautiful woman, inside and out! XOXO to you-